Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.

Like death, the subject of human selfishness is a giant, unresolvable topic that seemingly no one is willing to discuss honestly. Considering the nature of self-interest and our need to define terms to even have the conversation, I suppose I understand why.

Over the last few years while we have lived here in slightly greater isolation (a situation that should not be omitted) it simply feels like we are on a rather sane island surrounded by others more willing to excuse themselves to do whatever the hell they want, and I’m unsure where that observation comes from.

Have there always existed a group of people seemingly devoid of respect for others or for common rules communicated to them? Do we today live in a locale where this phenomena is more common than in other places in the world? Given we reside in one of the least populated areas of our country, that doesn’t seem right. It seems much more likely that humans have always acted the same way, albeit in their different contexts.

So then, how do I explain to myself what seems like a recent burgeoning understanding? It’s a reasonable question, and I think the answer might be counter-intuitive.

For instance, if I live within a certain mode of selfishness, then to me it is normal. Within that context, I would not realize I am selfish because I would have agreed to the behavior; therefore, the similar behavior of anyone else would seem to be completely normal, too. Hence within this existence, for me there would be no observation of others displaying similar behavior to mine because there would be nothing extraordinary about them. Selfish people like me would not stand out.

It seems unlikely the outside world is changing as much as I perceive it is — so the world must have always been this way. Perhaps, instead, I am breaking away from a selfish past and moving into something a little more autonomous. Does my greater sensitivity indicate how much of a dick I used to be? And does it mean that I am now less selfish?

This kind of thought process has been a consistent theme in our lives, making our personal growth an appropriate topic for our contemplation, but this week’s observation is really only a metaphor for more general ones. It seems like behaviors such as selfishness, lying, or ubiquitous stress is the manner in which we humans define ourselves. Perhaps I am only now beginning to understand the mechanism by which we as a family slip into and out of the social stream.